Friday, November 9, 2007

My Mother's Amazing Comfort

Daisy Parker
Focal point: Moment in Time


My Mother’s Amazing Comfort

I glance at the clock. The bright red numbers say 6:13. Thank goodness I don’t
have to get up and face this day for 17 more minutes. I sit up and hug my pillow, hoping for some kind of comfort. It still seems like a horrible nightmare. I stare back at the clock – still 6:13. How strange. Today is 6-13-1998…the day I will bury my mother.

As I reach to cut off the button on the alarm clock, my fingers touch my Daily Guideposts book that mother gave me last Christmas. I pick up the book. Huge crocodile tears began to drop all over the cover. For just a moment, I cuddle this book in my arms like I would hold a new born baby. I can feel my mother’s love. For more than 10 years, she made sure a Daily Guideposts was under the Christmas tree for me. Giving me this book was just one of the ways she shared her faith with me.

Memories started pouring into my mind as fast as water pours out of a faucet. It hurts so bad I want to just turn them off, but I can’t. That’s all I will ever have now – just memories.

I slip out of bed still holding my book tight to my chest as I head to the kitchen. With my book still cradled in my arms, I make the coffee. As the coffee’s brewing, I open my Daily Guideposts to June 13, 1998. As I begin reading the words, I can’t believe my eyes. This is the poem that was written on the page…

“When I must leave you for a little while
Please do not grieve and shed wild tears
And hug your sorrow to you through the years.
But start out bravely with a gallant smile,
And for my sake and in my name
Live on and do all things the same.
Feed not your loneliness on empty days
But fill each waking hour in useful ways.
Reach out your hand in comfort and in cheer,
And I in turn will comfort you and hold you near.
And never, never be afraid to die…
I’m waiting for you in the sky!”

An instant peace comes over me. The words in this poem tell me what my mother wants me to do. “Coincidence” some may say. I know better. I needed this message to comfort me and to give me strength because my life will never be the same again. I whisper a thank you prayer and ask God to give His newest angel a message from me, “Mother, I’ll love you forever and please don’t worry about me any more. I will live on and do everything in my power to make you proud.”

By now the aroma of the coffee has absorbed the kitchen as I am fixing my first cup. A warm comfort is filling my body as I’m sipping the caramel colored coffee (I like extra sugar and cream). Mother loved her coffee this way, too. Wiping the tears from my eyes, the memories of the two of us drinking coffee into the wee hours of the night while we giggled over our silly secrets, brings a smile to my face. I want to stay wrapped in this memory forever, but I feel a “little nudge” letting me know it’s time to come back to reality. Death has taken her body, but death will not steal my memories of her. Good memories are a gift from God, and I plan to use this gift every time I’m lonely or I’m sad or I’m just missing my mother. If it’s only for a brief moment, I can slip away into the comfort of my memories whenever I need to feel her love.

I need to quit thinking and get ready. Everyone’s meeting at my parents’ house before the funeral. Walking through the front door, my heart sinks when I see her empty rocker. My mother should be sitting there, smiling at me saying, “Hi Honey, I’m so glad you came over.” I fight back the tears.

With the commotion of 46 people in the house, it should be a family reunion, but it’s not. Squeezing between my cousins, I move to the corner of the room. Memories flash through my mind as I gently rub my fingers across the back of Mother’s rocker. Finally I get the courage to call everyone into the living room so I can share the poem from my Daily Guideposts. As they listen to the words, I notice this calming peace on everyone’s face. Then smiling through my tears, I say, “It’s time to go and celebrate her life.”





azing Comfort

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